Friendships

Now that we have started off with our vacations ... I can spend more time in writing about what I have been having in mind for quite some time now. I am very close to being a "terrible" writer, to be frank, I haven't really written anything before this blog. This is my first attempt to pen down my thoughts, so I don't know how well I am going to do it ... but anyway, I would try to be as frank as possible ... I feel that is the best way one can express oneself. Nothing that is not written from one's heart can be good to read, can it ? Can one write about the beauty of life when he has just come back from a hospital where he saw some loved one fighting against death ? Even if one does write, I believe it can't be good to read.

So ... what is friendship, or whom can I call my friends ? I have thought about this question for months and years together, maybe more so in the last few months or so for some reason or the other. Are there different "levels" of friendship or is it just binary - either someone is a friend or someone is not ? Do friendships have any limits or bounds ? Many questions like these I have been raising to myself, but unfortunately haven't got answers to most of them ... but coming thus far, I doubt whether any person can get answers to these questions ever in one's lifetime. Sometimes then I think, is it really worth trying to answer such questions ? Why not live life by the instant and not think about it at all ... is that the best thing to do ... why does one have to think about friendships / relationships at all ? Does it help us to build better friendships ? Do the people who have written books about friendships really have the best friends one can have ? Again the question comes to mind ... can one really write or tell others about something that he himself has not been able to understand or do well ? Can a "loser" in life write about or tell others about "how to be a winner" ?

I don't really know what I am thinking about at the moment ... plus the fact that I am feeling sleepy - tells me I better stop writing before I put in too much rubbish for others to read. Hope to continue writing on this topic ... and have a better understanding of it myself in the process !